Regret.

Yeah, sure. I had happy memories during high school. I had a handful. I could probably count them on two hands. Then I had some that were neither happy or sad, just memorable. Then, the majority, the unhappy ones. Those that were full of regret and remorse. Those which I desperately wish I could take back. Forget about. Throw away. Get scissors and chop that shit out of my life. I mean, why the hell did I even act the way I did? Why was I a selfish prick? Why did I choose to hurt all the people I did? I gave the immediate impression that I cared about them, when in my heart, my true intentions were to strip them of their dignity, and create enemies. Why did I choose to live that way? It's hard to recreate a first impression. It's impossible, as a matter of fact. It's far too late for atonement now. It's far too late to apologize and mend the pain. So what can I do about this uneasiness on my heart? What can I do to get the burden of regret out of my soul?

It's Been A While.

1. Recently, I got kicked out of the big yellow house I was staying at. This came about somewhat expectedly. I anticipated it, as much as I hate to admit. My bad choices led to this consequence that has essentially left me homeless. I got caught smoking pot, and I got caught up in a series of gargantuant, elaborate lies that hurt a lot of people that I loved dearly. I lost Toby, I lost Mary, I lost the love I once had with my mother. I lost a lot of friends. But this is what I get for creating my own reality. This is what I get for thinking that I am invincible and immune to consequences. I took advantage of the hospitality I was receiving from these wonderful people, and I puked it in their faces.

2. On the 13th of June, I will be making my big move to Everett, WA. I found a room that I can rent, only $450 per month (plus 1/4 of the household bills). It's roomy, it has a nice bathroom, and it is located in Everett's downtown area. Not to mention it is only 20 minutes away from my dearest Riley

3. And that's all I have to say about that.